It seems that this is my only outlet at the moment. So, the boys and I get home for the day, everything is going really well, Kyle is extra lovey, Joshua's being his cute self, then....something happned; I have no idea what!
Joshua wanted an orange, well, sure, I gave him one. Then, he was done and he said, "more please", so I said just a minute, and he threw a huge fit! Terrible twos, welcome to my home... He threw the bowl, and then himself onto the floor. Wonderful. Well, I told him he will have to sit in his bed if he doesn't stop. So, he stares at me a bit while decideding if he should stop his tantrum. Well, he made a good choice; this time.
Well, as time goes by, I'm playing football/fumble with Joshua and Kyle is watching a cartoon. I turn around and I see him SPIT onto the floor!!! Can you believe it!!! I was schocked! Well, of course he had to clean it up and go to his room. So, after a good timeout I go in and talk to Kyle about what he did and ask him why he did it.
"Because I wanted to..." ?!@#$?!@ What! I very calmly said that we don't ever do that, we talked for a minute, and then I told him that he couldn't watch cartoons for the rest of the day. Oh my gosh, you would have thought I told him he had to sleep on a cold dungeon floor for the rest of the week or his life or something. Screams, crying, throwing himself on the floor...sound familiar? Yes, Joshua just did it earlier... Well, so now I have to tell him to get back on his bed for another timeout, and a second tantrum starts up...my gosh! I'm so at the end of my rope! What in the world am I supposed to do!? Well, I tell him he needs to calm down and stop or he won't be going on his field trip tomorrow, which he's been looking forward to for weeks! That settled him down quickly (sort of) at least he went back onto his bed anyway....
AAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Can't it just be a little easier??? Please???
I'm sure the rest of the day will go well....? HA! =) At least now I'm smiling and not boiling, that's a good sign right?
Thursday, April 24, 2008
Quick Thoughts
Well, I was supposed to work out with my friend today at her Dojo...but her daughter is sick! :( I was really looking forward to is, since I haven't worked out there for eight years now, and I've missed it. So I'm home getting ready for work...or supposed to be, but apparently my fingers want to type again; those darn fingers! I'm telling you, they're the bain of my existance, I just can't get anything done!
So, I'm feeling particularly melancholy at the moment. Just a bit lonely. It's stupid really. I have a full life, lots of great friends and a wonderful family. I don't like feeling like this, because it makes me feeling like I'm not being particularly appreciative of my blessings. So I turned on KDUV and I'm listening to encouraging music to help my mood, because I should be praising God instead of having bittersweet thoughts. So, I'm praying my mood will lift and that my thoughts will be on Him above and His grace and mercy.
It is so exciting when I see friends lives turn around and they turn to God, making Him the center of their lives. The passion and love they have for Jesus is an inspiration. Always striving to do what is right and knowing they will be blessed. It's awesome. My friends know who they are, and if you read this, know how excited I am for you and for what I know God will do in your life, and in the lives of those you touch. My brother is also an awesome example of how amazing and miraculous God can change a person! If you know my brother, you know this to be true and you can no longer say that a person can't change, because there's proof right smack in your face! Their testimonies encourage me! I take one day at a time, learn more, strive for a closer relationship with Him and pray that I can bless the lives of some as others have blessed mine.
I hope I am a blessing to my boys, instead of a hinderance, with their learning of God's love and grace. Let's face it. I'm not the gentlest of people, and I'm so overwhelmed sometimes, that I just react. I don't want to be too hard on them, but sometimes things just go so badly with their attitudes and I'm so frustrated, that it seems that whatever they do sometimes is just too much. I'm losing my balance. I really would like God to send me someone to help out here! :) I think I've taken on too much, but I really couldn't say where I should pull back, or if I should; so if you're wondering how you can pray for me, pray for that! My boys will be with their dad this weekend, and I'm already missing them! But, there is so much to do, that I know my weekend will still be busy and full of responsibilities. I need to support my boys, but in the process, I get so little time with them. Well, such is the life of a single parent!
Well, I've lost my train of thought and I can't seem to get it back, and I've got to get started on work, so until next time!
So, I'm feeling particularly melancholy at the moment. Just a bit lonely. It's stupid really. I have a full life, lots of great friends and a wonderful family. I don't like feeling like this, because it makes me feeling like I'm not being particularly appreciative of my blessings. So I turned on KDUV and I'm listening to encouraging music to help my mood, because I should be praising God instead of having bittersweet thoughts. So, I'm praying my mood will lift and that my thoughts will be on Him above and His grace and mercy.
It is so exciting when I see friends lives turn around and they turn to God, making Him the center of their lives. The passion and love they have for Jesus is an inspiration. Always striving to do what is right and knowing they will be blessed. It's awesome. My friends know who they are, and if you read this, know how excited I am for you and for what I know God will do in your life, and in the lives of those you touch. My brother is also an awesome example of how amazing and miraculous God can change a person! If you know my brother, you know this to be true and you can no longer say that a person can't change, because there's proof right smack in your face! Their testimonies encourage me! I take one day at a time, learn more, strive for a closer relationship with Him and pray that I can bless the lives of some as others have blessed mine.
I hope I am a blessing to my boys, instead of a hinderance, with their learning of God's love and grace. Let's face it. I'm not the gentlest of people, and I'm so overwhelmed sometimes, that I just react. I don't want to be too hard on them, but sometimes things just go so badly with their attitudes and I'm so frustrated, that it seems that whatever they do sometimes is just too much. I'm losing my balance. I really would like God to send me someone to help out here! :) I think I've taken on too much, but I really couldn't say where I should pull back, or if I should; so if you're wondering how you can pray for me, pray for that! My boys will be with their dad this weekend, and I'm already missing them! But, there is so much to do, that I know my weekend will still be busy and full of responsibilities. I need to support my boys, but in the process, I get so little time with them. Well, such is the life of a single parent!
Well, I've lost my train of thought and I can't seem to get it back, and I've got to get started on work, so until next time!
Sunday, April 20, 2008
Sunday
Look at this...I get started again and I can't stop!! You know what will happen don't you? I'll go on my blurping splurge and then it will stop...almost like shopping for some, but me, I'll type. Of course, I can't promise quality, because once I get started, I'm either rushing through, or all kinds of stuff will want to come out throught my fingertips. Yes, I know; I have amazing fingertips..who would have thought they could think all on their own?! Ha. Enough of their jokes, they aren't very funny anyway.
Aside from procrastinating, I've been wanting to write about this all day. I don't know that I'm eloquent enough to get my thoughts across, or anything, but I'll try!
Let me first start out with how blessed in life I am. I sadly don't recognize it all the time, nor give God enough of the glory that He so deserves, but He has done amazing things for me, and when it hits me, it just hits me. I can't even say that I could name all the things right now, but I hope to be more aware of what He does for me everyday. Anyway, I was at how blessed I am; it's true. I've been so lucky to have so many people in my life who love the Lord with all they have. They are so beautiful on the inside and the Spirit just truly shines through, even in the midst of so many trials; my friends constantly give glory to God and praise Him, and just keep their focus on Him.
A friend was telling me at church today, and it really struck me, how some events came about this last week, that were understandably difficult, and she was telling me how in the midst of it, she had to look back and realize that the focus had come off of God and was focused on the negative things that were happening, and how when that happens; when we take our focus off of our Father, then that is when the enemy succeeds. And she was so right! What is his goal? To get our focus off of our Heavenly Father and put our thoughts and energies into things not above, on things that don't honor our Father. And I thought, you know? Of all I know and have learned in the last two years, how often have I not given Him glory? How often did I start to think about the things that were going on in my life, and while knowing that God is in control and He has a magnificant plan for all that I go through, my focus did not stay ON HIM. It too often is easily diverted to the mundane, the things I'm missing out on, and it's easy to start to feel sorry for myself! The everyday pressures start taking up my thoughts instead of my Lord...How sad.
In church recently the sermans have been excellent (which you can download if you want to hear them too). Today was on 1 Thessalonians 1:1-10. About walking by faith, knowing that nothing is impossible for with God. How human fears stifle our excitement about what God has done and will do. Our hope in God, our faith that he WILL do what he promises in the Bible. It was all a wonderful serman and I encourage anyone to subrcribe to Pastor Cece's podcast, or download it from the church website (it's on the blog). We are supposed to be going out and spreading God's word. Ministering to others, and always living for Him. Ephesians 2:10 - for we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand so that we would walk in them. He gave us all we need...
The concluding challenge for the week (and for life) is to imagine the abundant fruit of our ministry if we were all walking together by faith, working together in love, waiting together in hope and worshiping together as God's Elect...because He elected us, He chose us. Can you imagine??
We are to be bold; don't be afraid to stand for what you believe in. I know some fabulous people who aren't afraid to be bold...I wish I could say the same for me, but I can't. I hope to one day, but I don't think people see me as bold and strong. Someday, I hope so. Maybe this is my first step, actually posting this blog. I want to stand firm in the face of others in what I believe. Don't get me wrong, I don't have an unwavering faith by any means. It's easy when I'm with other believers to stand tall, stand firm; when I am by myself with acquaintances that I wonder if I do enough. And it's just that my selfish desires get in my way too much. My need to feel accepted or loved when I'm lonely. Because that seems to be the case lately anyway. I love the Lord with all my heart and I want to live for Him, and never have anyone mistake that I am His child and I love Him.
Anyway, I don't know that this made sense at all, I can't articulate very well, but I wanted to get this out...I've been wanting to for awhile, but I never did, and then I was going to create an anonymous blog just to write on, but I didn't, and now you get to read it...if you made it this far! Anyway, those were my thoughts...
Aside from procrastinating, I've been wanting to write about this all day. I don't know that I'm eloquent enough to get my thoughts across, or anything, but I'll try!
Let me first start out with how blessed in life I am. I sadly don't recognize it all the time, nor give God enough of the glory that He so deserves, but He has done amazing things for me, and when it hits me, it just hits me. I can't even say that I could name all the things right now, but I hope to be more aware of what He does for me everyday. Anyway, I was at how blessed I am; it's true. I've been so lucky to have so many people in my life who love the Lord with all they have. They are so beautiful on the inside and the Spirit just truly shines through, even in the midst of so many trials; my friends constantly give glory to God and praise Him, and just keep their focus on Him.
A friend was telling me at church today, and it really struck me, how some events came about this last week, that were understandably difficult, and she was telling me how in the midst of it, she had to look back and realize that the focus had come off of God and was focused on the negative things that were happening, and how when that happens; when we take our focus off of our Father, then that is when the enemy succeeds. And she was so right! What is his goal? To get our focus off of our Heavenly Father and put our thoughts and energies into things not above, on things that don't honor our Father. And I thought, you know? Of all I know and have learned in the last two years, how often have I not given Him glory? How often did I start to think about the things that were going on in my life, and while knowing that God is in control and He has a magnificant plan for all that I go through, my focus did not stay ON HIM. It too often is easily diverted to the mundane, the things I'm missing out on, and it's easy to start to feel sorry for myself! The everyday pressures start taking up my thoughts instead of my Lord...How sad.
In church recently the sermans have been excellent (which you can download if you want to hear them too). Today was on 1 Thessalonians 1:1-10. About walking by faith, knowing that nothing is impossible for with God. How human fears stifle our excitement about what God has done and will do. Our hope in God, our faith that he WILL do what he promises in the Bible. It was all a wonderful serman and I encourage anyone to subrcribe to Pastor Cece's podcast, or download it from the church website (it's on the blog). We are supposed to be going out and spreading God's word. Ministering to others, and always living for Him. Ephesians 2:10 - for we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand so that we would walk in them. He gave us all we need...
The concluding challenge for the week (and for life) is to imagine the abundant fruit of our ministry if we were all walking together by faith, working together in love, waiting together in hope and worshiping together as God's Elect...because He elected us, He chose us. Can you imagine??
We are to be bold; don't be afraid to stand for what you believe in. I know some fabulous people who aren't afraid to be bold...I wish I could say the same for me, but I can't. I hope to one day, but I don't think people see me as bold and strong. Someday, I hope so. Maybe this is my first step, actually posting this blog. I want to stand firm in the face of others in what I believe. Don't get me wrong, I don't have an unwavering faith by any means. It's easy when I'm with other believers to stand tall, stand firm; when I am by myself with acquaintances that I wonder if I do enough. And it's just that my selfish desires get in my way too much. My need to feel accepted or loved when I'm lonely. Because that seems to be the case lately anyway. I love the Lord with all my heart and I want to live for Him, and never have anyone mistake that I am His child and I love Him.
Anyway, I don't know that this made sense at all, I can't articulate very well, but I wanted to get this out...I've been wanting to for awhile, but I never did, and then I was going to create an anonymous blog just to write on, but I didn't, and now you get to read it...if you made it this far! Anyway, those were my thoughts...
One More Thing
WOULD YOU PLASE LEAVE A COMMENT!!! The more I get, the more likely I'll update it often! That and I like reading them...so don't make me beg!....please...pretty please...???
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